Wednesday, September 03, 2008

I let her

While at a labor day party this weekend the kids were running around the yard, being kids and having fun. One of my nieces, pretty close in age to the peanut, was kicking the soccer ball around with another older niece. I could see the peanut chasing them around the yard, wanting to get in on the game too. They seemed oblivious to her as she went from one spot to another trying to be a "part" of it all. Suddenly I noticed her stop and kind of look down as if she just felt excluded and didn't know what to do.

My natural instinct was to get up and say, "Include her too please!!", but I didn't. I sat and sadly watched her try to figure it out on her own. My heart broke as I sympathized with those feelings of hurt and exclusion. I didn't want her to experience any of that, not yet. I let her though.

I let her because I know I cannot protect her forever. I let her because I cannot always jump in and be her Saviour. I let her because I know she is going to have to grow up at sometime and there is going to be a lot of rejection in her life. I let her because there is injustice in our world that she is going to have to face on a daily basis in her life and I want her to know how to. I let her because I love her and want her to become a strong woman who can take care of herself when the time comes. I let her go in one small way.

And then that night, I gave her an extra hug or two and I let her know that she is loved.

11 comments:

meg said...

Oh, yes~ that is a hard one; back in Feb, when Sam didn't make the cut for the tennis team (long, ugly story involving money & favortism) I cried over seeing his dejection, putting away his team picture & letterman's jacket as if he didn't deserve to wear them. I so wanted to jump in & fight the dragon for him, but I knew it wasn't what he wanted or needed; it took a few months, but he's back playing, taking lessons & enjoying himself again- & plans on trying out again, though now he knows he doesn't always succeed.

amy said...

Oh this post made me tear up. WHat a good mommy you are!

Cyndi said...

Oh man. It is so hard to let them figure things out on their own. I think it is good for them to have a little bit of hurt so that they can be more sympathetic. (Is that spelled right? Oh well.) Then when they see another little kid being left out maybe they will remember how it feels and include them. That is my theory, anyway.

Carrie said...

Awwwwwww....why would anyone NOT want to play with her??? She's the cutest thing!! :)

Christine@AreWeThereYetMom said...

Good for you mom!
It's hard to do to just "Let it be", but you are right. They need to learn on their own how to handle all kinds of situations.

I did feel my cheeks get hot over, no one wanting to play ball with the "Peanut".

She is just too darn cute! :)

Amanda said...

i definitely feel this at moments...this need to "let her"...and then the realization that someday my babies are going to face the same struggles and pains over "fitting in" and "belonging" that i have...to realize life isn't easy. oh how my heart aches...and yet, how thankful i am for the mighty Savior who will wrap her in His embrace and be her shelter in those moments.

Elizabeth said...

Amy,
I loved this post! I tend to be very overprotective over my young ones, so I needed this reminder that I cannot protect them from everything and I need to step back on occasion and let them learn on their own without being constant protector. Thank You for your Wisdom!

Deedra said...

This is a great post! So often we want to be the "mother hen" for out little ones! It's soooo hard to let them experience not only the great things in life but also the harsh realities! Thank you for this reminder!
...and at her age, doesn't a hug from mom just make everything better in the end anyway? :)

Rebecca said...

oh i know what you are going through. it's heartbreaking. isn't it great to know we have a God who wraps us in His arms and gets us through?!

Adventures In Babywearing said...

Aw, that's a toughie. But something important to learn as they grow up!

Steph

Anonymous said...

Tough situation to sit out, Amy. I'm sure it was very hard. g