I don't know what it is about this time of year, but it usually has me contemplative and thoughtful...about the past and future. I suppose it is the thought of new beginnings, old habits, life's blessings over the past year, the trials and hurts that need to be overcome...so much so it can be overwhelming.
I was at church this past Sunday and they asked for any prayer requests you might have to be written on a little form that people could pray over on New Year's. Our church does a several hour praying in the new year where people can stop in at any time, pick up a card and pray for whomever is on that card. I picked up a card for myself and started writing. And writing. And writing a little more. Before I knew it the whole card was full. Is it sad that the entire card was just for my own issues? Apparently I must have A LOT!!
Normally at this time of year I make a resolution to lose some weight (which I still need to do), be kinder (um, yeah!) or stay on a budget (still working on that one), and normally by about January 3rd they are all shot and I go back to my old ways. Old habits definitely die hard.
This year I want to make a little different resolution, if you can even call it that. See, I don't like making promises or resolutions or pledges. I wind up feeling bound and obligated to meet them. I am way too stubborn to do that, get annoyed that I feel bound and give up knowing it won't be accomplished. Like last year my husband thought it would be a good idea to have a competition of who could read the Bible in the shortest time. The Bible. Seriously, the Bible. This is not a sprint, I said to him. So clearly, that did not happen and I gave up nearly instantaneously.
So this year, I want to just say, I want to be Godly. I want to grow closer to Him. I want to know about Him. I want to love Him more. Less me, more Him.
That sounds good to me. :)